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When Women Borrow
by Mary Sit
(Formerly) Boston Globe Real Estate Reporter
Jennifer Broderick, a 40-year-old divorced mother of one, remembers the quaking in her stomach when she bought her three-bedroom house in Walpole.
"The hardest part was emotional,'' says Broderick, an office assistant. "Do I really want to do this all alone? I'm not married; I'm all alone. The house is set back in the woods with a pretty long driveway.''
Broderick questioned her intentions. "I kept thinking I would get married,'' she says. "Subconsciously, that was on my mind.''
Broderick's experience is just one example of why single women may struggle more than single men or couples in the mortgage process. Their fears are bound up in traditional behavioral patterns and inhibitions.
Statistically, gender bias does not exist in lending patterns. None of several single women home owners interviewed for The Mortgage Almanac complained of discrimination. But a single woman's biggest problem may be herself.
More single women are buying houses on their own, stepping into a traditionally male domain. Even today, home financing still is largely a male preserve. There are relatively few women loan originators, underwriters, appraisers, and home inspectors, although the numbers are increasing.
Consequently, female home buyers must overcome deep-seated fears about buying and borrowing, housing experts say. One female real estate attorney says that much of her time with single women buyers is spent quelling their anxieties.
"Single women have the same fears as everyone else - and then a few more,'' says Joan A. Koffman, a real estate attorney at Koffman & Dreyer in Watertown "The few more fears are around the mortgaging.''
Single women tend to worry about their credit history and their privacy. Lenders routinely ask applicants for detailed financial histories and an explanation of their relationship with sources of money.
"They're very worried about what the bank is going to ask,'' says Koffman. "If a friend gave me this money, will the bank ask what the relationship is? It's not fun for most people. Single women feel particularly nervous about that process.''
Singles usually do not have someone with whom to discuss ideas or offers, and often will turn to their attorney for advice that tends to be more psychological than legal.
"They are still alone in the process; that makes for a particularly interesting relationship with their attorney,'' says Koffman. "Unless they have a very involved mother, they're going to call me.''
Andrea Dogon, a single, 30-year-old environmental consultant, decided to look for a house in Natick because she was tired of paying $650 in rent for an apartment she didn't like. After looking for a year, she bought a new 2,000-square foot cluster house. Dogon says it made economic sense to buy - but she admits that the idea of home ownership was scary.
"I love the home, so that ultimately overshadows the fear,'' says Dogon. "There are certain responsibilities. It is a little frightening. But I'm getting comfortable with it.''
Dogon says her mother cut out articles about women who bought and sent them to her so she wouldn't feel so alone. When it came time for her closing, Dogon insisted that Koffman attend.
"I wanted to know someone else was there to understand what was going on,'' says Dogon. "You never know. They might have taken advantage of me.''
Housing experts say that single women tend to come into the buying process well-educated and savvy. But single women tend to be more demanding than couples who buy houses together.
"They are for the most part conservative and ask an awful lot of questions and definitely take things very slowly,'' says Tori Alves, a mortgage banking consultant at Mortgage Information Services in Wellesley. "A lot of them like to meet face to face, rather than over a phone. I might spend more than twice the amount of time with a single borrower than I do with couples. They will call more often because they want it over with. It's more stressful (alone).''
Dianne Erickson, Assistant Vice President at Dedham Institution for Savings and a loan originator for 26 years, says she tries to allow adequate time to explain the mortgage process to her single women clients.
"You end up almost becoming their friend,'' says Erickson. "Until you become familiar with something, the fears don't go away. I personally try to make them feel comfortable, and speak their language.''
Erickson says her loan applications from single women have increased 20 percent over the last two years.
But two decisions prior to applying for a loan may be more difficult. Single women buyers agree that selecting a home and haggling for price may be more nerve-wracking than getting a loan.
"I cried,'' says Beth Beighlie, a 34-year-old photographer who bought a three-bedroom house in Roslindale. "I made an offer and they made a counter offer. Then I made another offer. Then I flipped out. It was like, "I can't do it. I'm going to be cash poor. I'm going to be living a very boring life in Roslindale, 'Siberia.'
But Beighlie ended up buying the house for $99,000 and has no regrets. Her story conveys one of the subtle advantages, and pleasures, of buying alone.
"In another life I was married and we couldn't agree on what we wanted,'' recalls Beighlie. "So it was nice to get what I wanted. I didn't have to negotiate with somebody else. Interest rates were down, prices were down, and I just didn't think I had to wait until I found the partner of my dreams.''
Mary Sit has been a columnist with the Boston Globe.